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Te acostumbraste a la soledad ó ella se acostumbro a ti
Siempre he sido una persona solitaria y muy independiente, nunca me ha hecho falta nadie para nada en ninguna actividad de tipo social, ya todos los que me conocen saben muy bien que me presento a todo tipo de eventos yo solita sin necesidad de compañía y sobre todo, esté estatus “solitario” no me molesta aflige o entristece lo más mínimo, por más que me frieguen con él amigos, familiares y vecinos.
Puede ser que sea mi extrema independencia la que está hablando, pero no me pueden culpar; puesto que tengo 27 años yo solita haciendo lo que me da la gana sin darle cuentas a nadie, complaciendo solo a una persona a “MI”.
Entonces el otro día que estaba divagando -como siempre- me vino a la mente esta frase (de mi autoria JAJAJA) “ME ACOSTUMBRE A LA SOLEDAD, o ella se acostumbro a mi” ya no soy yo nada más, ahora somos la soledad y yo.
Estamos en pareja en un compromiso mutuo que esperamos dure muchísimos, muchísimos años en un compromiso a largo plazo, a esta capitalina loca no le va eso de andar en dos, por experiencia propia se que cada que lo intento salgo escaldada, así que mejor me abstengo de cualquier intento, porque si yo les contara de mis fracasos e intentos me dirían con justa razón “resígnate”.
Puede ser que mi cerebro al pensar que esta en compañía de la soledad, no se sienta solo sino más bien acompañado y de una excelente compañía, que al igual que yo siempre ha vivido en el aislamiento. Sé que suena contradictorio e ilógico que me jacte de estar sola pero pretenda su compañía.
Me pregunto ¿Por qué nos hace falta compañía?, ¿Por qué vivimos buscando algún complemento, en lugar de completarnos nosotros mismos? ¿Realmente hace falta alguien más?
Dejando de fuera las necesidades fisiológicas sexuales, (necesidades básicas que se pueden suplir de muchas formas, para esto y para muchas otras cosas no hace falta una media naranja solo basta un poco de imaginación), me pregunto porque siempre buscamos andar en dos y tener a alguien más. Es que no me deja de dar vueltas en la cabeza, porque no nos basta con nosotros mismos, porque todos los solteros del mundo necesitan a alguien más para poder ser plenos y felices; es que buscar a alguien más para que realice una búsqueda interna en ti y encuentre lo que te falta o lo que te hace feliz se me hace una tremenda estupidez, por qué para ser feliz no necesitas conocer a alguien más sino conocerte a ti mismo.
Retomando un poco la frase “Te acostumbraste a la soledad ó ella se acostumbro a ti” sí la analizamos bien, más allá de la etiqueta que es una estúpida idea mía, es una frase con poder y muchos ángulos en la que: uno, tú te pegaste a la soledad ó dos, ha estado tanto tiempo contigo que ya se le hace raro dejarte, lo interesante sería saber cual fue primero.
Pero llegamos a lo mismo ya no estás solo si la palabra soledad es la que te asusta, ahora estas con alguien más, sí la soledad, aquella a la que tanto temor le tienes y la que no te quiere dejar ir.
En serio porque nos preocupa tanto la soledad, creo que está sobrevaluada en estos tiempos.
Viviendo a un ritmo acelerado en el que reina el stress, la depresión y la melancolía el remedio de tales males es medio mal acompañar a alguien ¿no lo sé? Pero no por no estar solo hagas tonterías o vivas cometiendo errores.
Bloguera de hueso colorado desde el 2008. Porqué siempre hay algo que decir yes@elblogdeyes.com
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Esperanza,
araña negra del atardecer.
Tu paras
no lejos de mi cuerpo
abandonado, andas
en torno a mí,
tejiendo, rápida,
inconsistentes hilos invisibles,
te acercas, obstinada,
y me acaricias casi con tu sombra
pesada
y leve a un tiempo.
Agazapada
bajo las piedras y las horas,
esperaste, paciente, la llegada
de esta tarde
en la que nada
es ya posible…
Mi corazón:
tu nido.
Muerde en él, esperanza.