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Cuando eso pasa puedes solo puedes contestar de dos maneras, la primera y políticamente correcta, o como a mí me gusta hacerlo con la segunda opción mientras se me saltan las venas de la sien y los ojos, me pongo verde hulk, ya saben, para que de una buena vez el pasado entienda que ya no estoy dispuesta a recibirlo de nuevo.
Segunda opción, personalmente a mí me gusta más:
Chingao pasado, deja de joderme, ya no es, ya pasó, es historia vieja, harina de otro costal, capítulo cerrado.
No entiendo porque es tan difícil entender para el pasado, que es algo que ya termino sin opción a secuela o segunda parte, ¿Por qué?
Y estoy hablando genéricamente porque últimamente he detectado que este tiempo en el que se conjugan las cosas en pasado, siempre regresa mi como un boomerang y lo peor es que soy tan polite y buena gente, ok, ok, mentira, lo acepto, solo dialogo con el pasado no por buena persona, sino por curiosa, para descubrir con mucha frustración el sentimiento original que experimente cuando termine ese capítulo pasado de mi vida.
Ahora estoy convencida que lo más interesante de que el pasado toque a tu puerta en tiempo presente, no es la curiosidad por descubrir la acción que lo trajo de vuelta, tampoco lo es comprobar si la otra persona cambio, si el tiempo sufrió efecto y la hizo madurar porque eso no pasa, tú sigues siendo la misma persona con errores, defectos y la otra persona es la misma persona que te harta, te desespera y te hace preguntarte constantemente ¿por qué chingaos sigo hablándote?
No es que este siendo amargosa y quejumbrosa, pero reencontrarte con alguien que salió de tu vida porque no compartía tu visión o filosofía de las cosas, no va a regresar de forma triunfal a contar una historia diferente y más bien eso se convertirá en un bucle del tiempo en el que se repiten los mismos errores de la misma forma. Para mí ya es bastante tortuoso recordar mis errores del pasado y ver que están por repetirse me hace sentir miserable, por una razón, porque no aprendí la lección original y el hecho de estar atascada en el mismo problema eternamente me hace pensar que no tiene entonces ningún sentido tratar de avanzar.
Pero el problema no es el pasado queriendo regresar y convertirse en un error del tiempo que se repetirá eternamente, el error es mío, por siquiera hacerle caso, por prestar atención a todas esas personas que en un punto de la vida me sacudí; ahora entiendo que siempre querrán regresar y entre más crezca, entra más envejezca, mayor será la cantidad de personas que quieran regresar a mi vida, pero depende únicamente de mi si las recibo, si escucho sus quejas por un minuto o por una eternidad.
No tiene sentido alguno agobiarse por el pasado y las personas que viven en él; de verdad he descubierto que el poder que tienen ahora sobre mi puede ser nulo o puede ser atormentante, pero de la única persona que depende es de mí.
Y hasta hoy comprendo que el pasado es pasado.
No sé porque pitos cada que viene a tocarme los hombros yo volteo y me pongo a platicar con el como si fuera presente, como si el tiempo nunca hubiera pasado, como si todo lo malo, dicho o sentimientos de frustración que experimente desaparecieran; obviamente los superas con el tiempo, maduras, aprendes y deja de agobiarte. Pero olvidar el pasado, sus acciones y sus desenlaces es muy peligroso y dicen grandes sabios de la historia que no conocer el pasado te condena a repetirlo de por vida; entonces sabiendo eso entiendo que olvidar no es buena idea, pero no por NO olvidar quiero decir que NO perdone.
Mi memoria no se borró y siempre debería tener presente las verdaderas cosas y como pasaron.
El pasado es pasado y punto. Se necesitan huevos para comprender que una persona que se fue, es historia vieja ya sea porque esa persona lo decidió o porque la invitaste muy “amablemente” a largarse de tu vida.
Pasado es historia vieja, para que desperdiciar energías, tiempo, esfuerzo o ganas en alguien que no perfila en tu presente. A mí que me caga ver una película dos veces, un programa o leer un capítulo viejo. Sé que hay historias y libros que valen la pena leerse dos, tres, cuatro o más veces, pero esas son historias excepcionales que cuentan algo que te impacto; no historias chafas sin presupuesto que te hicieron sentir mal o te dejaron un mal sabor de boca para que revivirlas de nuevo.
Dime ¿qué haces tú?, te atascas en un bucle de tiempo permitiéndote que persones de tu pasado regresen a él, o te enfocas en el presente; un tiempo en el que esas personas ya no están.
Bloguera de hueso colorado desde el 2008. Porqué siempre hay algo que decir yes@elblogdeyes.com
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